just for right now

Just for right now, I love you.

On my tippy toes.
Indifferent on pivot and hinged
Parched for you
Heart fleeting
Like a thirsty summer
Making emotionless faces you read well
Just for right now, you can tell,
Just right here,
Just in this moment,
I am sure that I love you.

Tomorrow’s uncaring to you.
I can’t see what you don’t dare.

But the way the sun shines through the shutters shutterflies shine your sleepyface honeybutter
Sleeping next to you is wonderful. No stutter.

As I’m pretending it isn’t going to fade.
As if temporary makes it better.
The smell of your whatever.

The pecks I can never get enough of
The comfort of our snuggle
The bitter arrogance and opposing enchantment so opposite my antics
That I’m scrapbooking stickers and colorful overlays and stamps
We’re oilwater whence comes lava lamps

You can superimpose any given moment and just for right now in this glow of hope or hopeless…
I will dream it lasts when it won’t though

Just for now; you’re ornamental.

When you smother your face in my…
When you try and it’s short-lived
When we talk about the past and you deny me whole futures
When I try to be patient but useless is useless

You’re Edward, I’m Bella.

You suck the air out of my chest and replace it with feathers that tickle to death
And just for right now – there’s nothing else.
I can cross my fingers pinky swear and
Play your words on repeat on repeat,
Ready but unready for the love in question.

Only to guess what?

You know like a guess what I’m wasting?

When you’re deep in slumber I’m restless and waiting.

Guess what grey area?

I get it.
I get it.
I get it.
I get what you were saying when I said I miss you --and you said “already?”

You were telling me to love you temporarily.

But I already love you invariably.

You were telling me to love you erratically when I already love you perpetually.
You were telling me to love you for now.

When who am I kidding?
Are you fucking kidding me?

I already love you unbearably.



“I’m no fool. I’m naïve and I like to believe what I want to believe but I’m no damn fool.”- lalanii