rain

When lookit you and your sad face you made it rain

You gave up

And you put conditioner in it

You backpeddled

You’re fickle

95 degrees to hail please

Help please hello?

Youre just screaming me asleep youre just rock knock hard-headed

I tell you that even though I fell for you I wouldn’t ever let it

Consume me

Love outdoes what it undoes

You are why im not a good book keeper

The reason my eyes were wide stuck trying to stare through a very very long midnight when you haven’t held me for the whole night and I can barely feel you there because you’re too tired to really be there.

Your pout is sugared in doubt and contagious

You choke me midway sleepwalking to my pretty peach mausoleum

You’ve made believe its bittersweetly and we both gonnna love deeper than we can die

then wake up to your adoring snoring last night but you --you tried

To cheer me up when things weren’t going alright but i

Was so used to rotten egg whites I let you go to sleep without our regularly scheduled fight

But you would have just talked me out of the touareg and

Would have had the nerve to want your own truck when gas is $400 a gallon?

You like my cooking but joke it’s plastic

Burped, rubbed your stomach and made love to me fantastically

You liar for a living.

We ticky timebombs til my daddy says you're awesomely umm

And my mommmy says she’s numb to the song we play

And you leave me at home all day to wonder

If youre wondering about how wonderful we slept to candleflames

Lit our faces over nothing important to add to my wishlist

I didn’t already know you fulfilled.

My number is...

This fossil model should have called me a long time ago. LOL...

Dammit!

My feelings can be controlled but my heart is on auto-pilot; you tell me
This. Is. Good. To. Know.

I’m not going to tell you these are random thoughts as a scapegoat
‘cause they’re not…

Although,
I wanna climb wAtErWaLlS for you
Fly through mudpies. Give you a thumbs up upside down
trying to turn your world
(Around)

But…

I’m shallow and prefer things immeasurably diluted or pleasurably concentrated
And I want shopping sprees on rodeo and a whole land of playdough you can’t afford
And then when you can I will have already married second best so there.

But just for the sake of this poem’s effect…

You and i… would have a tea party in the sky just you and i. yea
We’d toast to lighting in sunny weather
And your heart would be made of sweet jelly because I said it better
Welcome to my world where the toilet tissue has lotion in it
Wicked tickles and secrets aren’t nearly as bitter as being bitten

And I’m boisterous for no reason
You all like me anyway

And you thought I would write you a poem because you wrote me one…
Well now wouldn’t you know me well enough?
To pick me out of a crowd of whoevers and call me special longer than I can take it
And hope that you understand because I improvise on cue

This is where you want to be. Don’t you know it.
Stuck in the snickering corner of me sitting in the dark all by yourself you
Waiting so long to come apart asking myself
Why this man is still in my diary?
Get him out of my writing!

And we can all snap out of it because it never has a happy ending
Cross your heart and hope to die. Stick a needle in your eye. Pinky swear,
Matching lockets and shoestring rings of forget me not things

But the only way you can really get to me is if I can’t forget you long enough to remember anyone else and, then of course, ahem-- if you share

And for the record because of where I stand

I just thought you should know that
Promises aren’t meant to be broken; dammit.

My perfect MAN

.who loves me.

someone who’s lovely

someone to like me when I look ugly

someone. someone.

protective but without overzealousness

or overjealousnesses

i could really even go without obsessive compulsiveness

someone who focuses

his effectual intellects

someone without addictions to weed or cigarettes

reflectively sentimental

a MAN with meaning

a man in dreaming

“big enough to fit fantasies hopes and realities, even”

someone, 20% outspoken 30% introverted

35% determined 15% motivational

someone who forgives, god~fearing, and witty

someone who thinks my head scarf and rollers are pretty anyway

someone who can adapt and improvise

has to have nice teeth clean shoes pretty eyes

taking; taking the lead without taking over me

and giving: giving more than what is needed without giving his love to just anybody

someone who may even hurt my feelings because he isn’t a liar

someone unconditionally true and consistent

someone to ride me off on a white pony

someone with more assets than liabilities

someone to love and accept me with understanding and emotion

sensible and sensitive not soft or sissy

pampers me

accepts the imperfects in me as is; forever

then shows and tells his own mistakes to better us together

.the perfect’st love.

somebody to hug

somebody to love

someone to hold hands with

where did all the gentlemen go?

Are all the men so helpless?

Tactful and open minded

Confident stance

Not afraid or too good to dance dammit dance

Sophisticated and polished

A promised person

Wouldn’t be so bad if he kept his word even

Kisses and help with the dishes

Heaven for breakfast

Utopia for dinner

A cell phone that doesn’t ring too much or too little

A mindset that isn’t equivocal

Ambitions, aspirations, someone with aim and patience

Legal occupation, preferably their own place

Respects my space *contrasts* the fact that

I LOVE YOU in my face

not too much into… too much of anything

well off regardless if

dining with the finest lavish gifts and diamonds

or in the cold sharing a coat in absolute .silence.

somebody to make everyday errands

seem like vacations

All about business definitely not about any makeshifts

Smiles and helpful not helpless

Careful not careless

Where is this man and DOES he even exist?

When you speak

can't help it

When you speak

Stars twitch. dandelions take flight monarchs kiss

Christmas lights *flicker * Cherry Vanilla Hansen’s fizzle

Voice tones get caught off guard breathing patterns tire

Today goes out of style

Prefigurations miscalculate

And heartbeats drum up revelations…

And name them prince {insert name here}

C'mere.

Come over here I said.

And the way you look through me

Is like little by little pushing a dart into my heart that tickles

Little by little looking around the room at everyone else admiring you

Is like asking you a question I knew already

Taking the hint.

Not wanting to.

When you speak

The colors in the sky don't have time to get their shit together

So there's a nervous improvised blueberry and sherbet blur coinciding as if everything had precise perfect timing

And music mutes to your silence

`Ahem`

Because you don't speak much but when you speak everyone can't ignore themselves

Ballroom dancing stops on cue

Everyone looks around clueless

On impulse

And you look at me so commonsensical

As if I know what to say when I don't.

So I say something stupid like why me?

Can't help it

Blame it on the anxious you ache in me how I second your thoughts, just as good as always

And most days I can't help but imagine your hands in my hair… and your kiss where it’s careful

Because when you speak

You make perfection envious enough to make a mistake

You excuse my sarcasm and give me just-in-cases

You make sense of my hurricane no warning

And understand the mathematics of a good morning

Call to compliment me in the form of beautiful sleeping

‘Cause on those days when I feel worse

You say I look so good in fireworks

And you understand where this is going

When I don't know where this is going

And for that I just say THANK YOU. Over and over; for you keeping your door open.

you are so fine i need a parachute, shit.

You so fine I need a parachute, shit.

I gotta jump. I know better / still can’t help it.

tastes like krispy creame and coldstone

answering like its crack in my cell phone

kisses = trembles. your touch is too much.

You say you’re addicted

I still got one up.

I bet gummybears’d danced in my dreams if that’d be appropriate.

But since it’s not *hopeless* got me spoiled rotten and choking

Wanna jump on the bed with you

Wanna jump on the bed

Want you in the middle

Want you in every little bit

You so fine you make me wanna primp.

Priss and sparkle. patootie my bootie out.

paint my nails every day fa you.

I’d give you a lap dancing ~ parade~

Holding your hand I can do anything.

There’s nothing better that I’d rather do

than have a breathing contest with you.

You so fine I need a parachute.

I’d jump blindfolded into your nowhere.

We can go do the laundry. Pay the bills. Run the errands.

We can go argue Your kisses kismet - psychedelics.

You roll n rock hop hip.

Rock paper scissors who cares.

Tag I’m it.

Cause I wanna be it.

I want you all up in my business like its front page.

It appears that you making me cheerios with sugared strawberries and honeyed bananas has gone to my head. You so fine I wanna freefall.

Run in place. Hula hoop on your heart in a giggle celebration…

you tickle me in the silliest wave. You my carnival ride.

I’d like to have insomnia with you so we can sleepwalk into a universe catastrophic and cosmic but I don’t see you that often.

So I guess that’s what’s bothering me.

You make it hard

You make it hard to like you when you can hardly remember me

Outside of your daily activities

Outside of you bouncing your basketball

Outside of you not listening when I call you

You make it hard to like you

You make it hard not to.

You remind me of the light switch.

I must remind you of the wall.

You make it hard to like you,

You make it hard not to fall

You make it hard to stay steady pause.

You make it hard when you don’t respond

-Harder when you respond when YOU want to

You make it hard when you give me the ball,

And you know I don’t play no damn ball

But you leave the ball in my court

You leave my imagination to sort

Out the details like some scorned scavenging hint-less schizophrenic

When it should be simple

But it isn’t. isn’t it?

You make it hard when you’re two toned. Upside down.

I give good directions you’re just turned around.

I make awkward suggestions I tell you where I found it, try me

Won’t you put it back on the shelf if you didn’t want to buy me?

Doesn’t that hurt you to death

When you aren’t around me?

Why should I have any energy left

If I gotta dance circles around you?

Chivalry is not dead.

How about next time we try Disneyland?

And yes I want you to be the spokesperson . the jump up. the speak out.

the yes I’m standing here

But why should I have to pout

Before you notice you left me out?

Before you see that I fell down.

You make it hard, damn, you make it hard

When I’m here and I’m all yours

But you’re fickle and mislaid

And I am unwell about it.

At times I want you to doubt it, disagree, shout you’re ignorant bliss, invite me into your make believe world,

Give me more than a kiss - how about I need intimacy in a sense of who the WHAT is this man I’m sleeping with?

Is it even necessary or is this necessarily it?

You make it hard to like you.

You make it hard not to.

You make it hard for me to make up my mind when I already knew it was you.

You make it hard when I knew better but then there came you

You make it hard when I run out of ways to show you

You make it hard when i can hardly be myself enough to get to know who

YOU- are, even.

You make it hard cause this wasn’t even supposed to be this long.

Maybe you should call me so that we can talk.

happy dance

The way you happy dance the who huh and complicate things makes me wanna wish on your welcome and thank you better than a hailstorm cause you skip in the shower and your witchcraftish mixture of hello is

dreamier than rowboatrides and a kiss on the cheek is like two sparks a check mark and a weeks worth of the prettiest pleases and I like your tonic. I'm sick enough for your medication. I like the way you worsen things,

just to make them better. And even though I'm full enough I need a second helping. You're the warm that the high insides of my thighs wanna rub against. You're my dissonance and harmony tongue kissing and I love the way

we push forward. you're my edge for a reason you've shown me how to write vows so easily. You've given me the go ahead so much I know I walk first and I know my door's open already. You wait all day just to look at

me elatedly and say "babycakes I've made you something;" and it's awesome. you know the antidote to my lock the key to my clock the therapy you've got puts well-studied psychologists to a crying shame. It's like the whole

world's underwater, but we can breathe. And we play games like scattergories and we make love enormously as Robin sings "I need love" in the backdrop. You painted perfect picture melted worth it with your helpful

hold on if I'm careful [missing nothing] simple thorough in your answers i can't help but stare more; and so on.

The way you sunshine is blinding

I am I am I am tryING not to think of you. Contentedly failing. Sailing on

velvet horizons. Your ring tones my favorite song. Your long days are all I wanna hear about. Your call waiting is so emergent. You are a pastel colored ceiling I get to stare up at every evening

because you know we dream that well together.

Loyalty

You claim faultless.
You're triflin and frivolous,
but babie i'd love you like the night sky spoilin the summertime.







You aren't loyal or fair and I can rarely depend on your barely but babie i'd love you like resting and nestling and wrestling in the midst of an upset then settling with our chest to chest and






i love it like my best guess close enough and i hate that you don't watch doves or read epilogues but you'd fuck the scream out of my throat like i was being robbed






and you aren't happy with where you are at all and that doesn't intrigue me it awes. when i look beyond pupils and words i can't disregard emotions but the second you tell me you would love second guessing






and you would break up a happy home for a phone call good night or a helloiloveyoualright is the moment i'd stop dreaming of your luscious fucking arms and kiss you like the wrong way head on traffic sirens the alarm






best you let the clock alarm best you let the clock alarm... so i can tell you i just came to death with all my damn clothes still on.